Xiu Xiu

Fabulous Muscles

(5 Rue Christine; 2004)

By Chet Betz | 24 February 2004

Hidden Track: “Xiu Xiu Sings the Re-View View Blues (Self-Absorption Makes Jamie a Muck Sponge) OH!”

The first four tracks on my new album are cool.
The first four tracks on my new album sound tight, all right, all right all right, all right.
The first four tracks on my new album have weight.
The first four tracks on my new album resonaaaaaaaaaaate.

LA LA LA LA! I Luv the Valley OH!

Glam-glitch-goth-rock-snap-crackle-pop hits,
Bauhaus with some Notwist habits…oh shit—
Now I spit spoken word over a formless mess.
Let’s Support Our Troops:
“Oh wait, you totally did know that that would happen, because you’re a jock, who’s too stupid, and too greedy, and too unmotivated to do anything else but still be the biggest…”

I’m wanking all over your poor face
In a black turtleneck sweater.
I’m reading you diary entries written in blood.
I’m smearing pap all over the place
In a black turtleneck sweater.
I am a naked Brecht and vulnerably uncomfortable.

And you’re my fact-checkin’ cuz! I hate you OH!

I imagine Fabulous Muscles
As I dry hump this sordid hole in the wall.
My mummy shrills, “Stop that, Stewart!”
I squeeze my thighs and cry, “I don’t wanna!”

“Cremate me after you cum on my lips, honey boy.” OH!

Shuddering to think, my bright eyes shed tears for fears
And I’ll sing “Blue Velvet.”
You’ll drink Pabst Blue Ribbon.
Brian, you’re a vampire. And I’m back on track.
It’s okay, okay okay, okay.

See, the last four tracks on my new album are okay.
The last four tracks on my album don’t make you sigh.
The last four tracks on my album don’t make you roll your eyes.
The last four tracks on my album don’t make you whine…too much.

I’ll punch your mummy in the chest OH!

In Clowne Towne we’re swinging on a pop gamelan high.
We’ve got some sense, and we’ve got some class…
Even if I do call you “a true, ridiculous dumbass.”
Sorry, my lyrics (phallic knife version) oft recall fecal mass…
Four tracks good, four tracks decent
Around a two-track heart of sucking muck.

One chick away from a 69, you say?

OH!