Alexandra Burke: "Hallelujah"

Another year over and another Christmas single from the British reality talent show behemoth that is X-Factor. For half a decade the Christmas number one spot has been governed by the winners to the point where the festive season is intrinsically linked with the show. These non-threatening MOR dirges have become as part of a British Christmas as a sedating heavy Christmas dinner and the mid-afternoon drunken fog that descends after one too many sherries. Be it the mawkish feel-good covers—“When You Believe,” “Against All Odds”—or the original compositions—“That’s My Goal,” “A Moment Like This”—their success lies in routine and familiarity. Every year, the singles narrate the singers’ plight through the auditions and ABBA week until they are crowned, in a flood of tears, like Miss World with a lyric that surmounts to a musical inauguration speech. “My life was terrible, but, I did it,” the songs seem to say and by buying their single, we contribute to the season of goodwill by letting these battlers achieve their dream. Then, come the new year, we wrap up the tinsel, we go back to ignoring our neighbours and we forget about the reality show winners full in the knowledge that come June we’ll go through the whole process again.

But this year our cosy UK programme had managed to escape both the Christmas bubble and our borders to create a star with a both credible and incredible song. Leona Lewis and “Bleeding Love” exploded and X-Factor changed—it meant business and was after credibility. Where we once saw reams of achingly provincial pop singers we suddenly saw a spate of soulful girls capable of giving Leona a run for her money. Mariah Carey was a mentor, Britney Spears relaunched her attack on the UK on the show and, in the final, Beyonce appeared to duet with contestant Alexandra Burke on a blisteringly histrionic take on “Listen.” Undoubtedly, this performance was the tipping point which pushed the British audience into putting Alexandra through to the showdown where she and an execrable boyband took turns to perform what would be the single. As the stage filled with dry ice and the slow guitar arpeggios began it seemed like the bid for credibility had floundered. The easy route of releasing a schmaltzy ballad was too attractive for the show’s financiers to risk anything more substantial. “Now I’ve heard there was a secret chord, that David played, and it pleased the Lord.” Um.. what? Yes, unbelievably the British reality show had chosen, as the winner’s song, Leonard Cohen’s insurmountable “Hallelujah,” a beautiful modern anthem that maps through evocative religious imagery the extra-sensorial release of music and of the orgasm.

Of course, no criticism can be geared towards Alexandra Burke herself. She delivers a powerful vocal which tries to instill meaning into the song’s esoteric lyric which is baffling to most, including herself, undoubtedly. The criticism should lie with Simon Cowell who, like most, was introduced to the song by Jeff Buckley’s fragile cover and that he should apply the emotional power of this song to secure a Christmas number one. In the way the song has become shorthand for countless film soundtracks to highlight a particularly portentous plot twist, we are not too far from Cowell masterminding any release with the proviso that he will shoot a baby seal point blank in the chin if it doesn’t become a hit.

One would hope it would be Cohen’s perverse sense of humour to allow for arguably his most respected composition to be espoused with such tawdry sentimentality. Maybe it was the vision of families shifting uncomfortably in their seats at Christmas lunch while Alexandra braves the key-change, string swells and backing choirs and, without a hint of irony, sings about Bathseba’s moonlit bathing, Delilah’s emasculation of Samson and cold, little broken hallelujahs. But, with an irony which would tickle Cohen no end, the pursuit of credibility has led Cowell to turn one of the most spiritual compositions into tacky, consumerist fodder. And if that’s not the spirit of Christmas then I don’t know what is.